Caffeine

I slept 11 hours last night and had dreams all night long. It was restful sleep, though I woke up in a haze. I am on my fourth cup of coffee now, fiending on caffeine. Yeah, I know it is bad to rely on drugs to speed up your conscious process. I actually quit drinking coffee for a week about a month ago. It really seemed to make no difference to me.

I have got some thinking to do today about my personal life. My girlfriend will probably want to hang out and get drunk with me this afternoon if she has the day off. Like I said yesterday, this is not about her, but it affects me. I don’t really want to be around people who are using if I am trying to kick the habit. Part of getting clean is cutting ties to others who have the same bad habits as yourself. This is how I quit smoking weed. I don’t hang with stoners. So I have some serious thinking to do, and perhaps some heartache.

I have been trying to sell off some of my old stuff on craigslist. I sold an old radio the other day, which is where I got the money for cigarettes. $25 doesn’t go very far at seven dollars a pack. I should be trying to sell some books. I was giving them away to the library over the summer, but I have a lot more to move. Books are a hard sell though. Craigslist is just not the place for intellectuals. And Amazon charges money, so they are not an option at this time.

I need to look into getting a job. I have a degree in science, but it has been so long since I did any actual science, I don’t know if I am capable. I applied for a job at a bookstore last week, but they were not interested in giving me an interview. Seriously, I don’t have the skills to make this blog pay off either. I think what I want to do today is write a decent article on recovery from addiction in Word and post it here for my loyal readers. Having lived through the consequences of addiction, I think I have some perspective on the problem.